The Father of My Children

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I will always be able to say I made at least one really wise decision in my life.

I had this feeling about him, he wasn’t what I thought I wanted…but he was so much more. I’m sorry ladies. I wish I could duplicate him and hand him out one for each of you. I can honestly say he is the best dad I have ever known. He comes home after a tough day of running his own cabinetry business, which is hard physical work, and he never hesitates to take the kids and play. He loves his children so much…and it’s so easy to see. This is what’s sexy to me.

I need to mention that this Father’s Day is also our 7th Anniversary.  I definately don’t have the rumored “7 year itch” people sometimes talk about. I know what’s out there, I’ve seen it. I’m more than pleased with my selection in marriage, and sometimes I wonder why I deserve him.

Of course other times I remind him of why he deserves me!

Happy Everything Honey. Thanks for putting up with this rambuncious family.


I found Hell on Earth

…wait…food…sustinance…a shower if I have the strength…then I may be able to tell my story…

Okay so I was SO tired last night I couldn’t shower, I could barely manage to fall in to my bed. I hope I’m able to convey my story in a way which you will understand the HORRORS of what I went through…

“Hot Yoga”  my little sister mentioned. SHE wanted to try it. I told her I thought it was admirible, but it sounded horrific. Needless to say I found myself going with her last night.

105 degrees  I’ll let that sink in…

“…105 degrees and we ask that you don’t leave the room until the very end of class.” They said.  I was terrified. Just walking into the room was torture for me and I didn’t know how I would work out in such conditions.  I paced the hallways, went to the bathroom twice, and finally commited. I walked in. They shut the doors behind me.  All I could do was stand helplessly on my mat while I gulped water.

A skinny, hairy man taught the class. I knew the type. I’m no stranger to yoga, but this wasn’t your momma’s yoga. His voice wan’t the soft calm voice of a yoga instructor but rather fast and bossy, like an auctioneer. 

I found that movement was my friend in this furnace. When I moved, I could create a small breeze. We went through the different standing poses and I found myself enjoying the class. I’ve always loved yoga, I love that it’s personal. You must only work at your own pace. Everyone seems to have their own strengths and weaknesses. I had many weaknesses this night.  Usually I have great balance. But my chi was thrown off by the heat! Then we went down to floor poses. I thought this meant the class was almost over. I spent the next 45 minutes struggling to survive this class…

I’m reminded of this road trip I took with a loser ex-boyfriend.  He drove a junky little Toyota with no AC.  We drove from California to Yuma, Arizona, in the summertime, with no AIR CONDITIONING!  We had these gallons of water with us in the cab. They were supposed to be for the radiator. In my desperation I started pouring the water on us as we drove. To me it was quite hilarious. It annoyed my loser ex-boyfriend. He didn’t want his back all sticky. This brought me much delight, and made me pour more, and laugh harder.

I really wanted to pour what contents I had left in my water bottle over my body. I don’t know what stopped me. I was already drenched with sweat from every pore of my body. I felt like Ebeneezer Scrooge in the Disney version, of course, where he’s pushed into a firey grave. I almost started shouting in delirium…

“I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all Three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach. Oh, tell me I may sponge away the writing on this stone!”

Finally after much inner torture the teacher declared “Namaste.” I practically ran into the fresh air.  I felt a bit nauseous on the ride home.

The worst part is my little sister LOVED it and is ready to sign us up for the next 4 months of classes. Maybe I need to give it a chance. Maybe the first class is the worst? I don’t know. I’ll let you know how the journey goes.


I loved my backyard growing up.
We had an acre, and the back half was jungle to my brothers and I.
I don’t remember how long it was before my parents decided to rototill it and start gardening. But before then we had many a long summer day walking through the tall grass.

We would set traps for eachother, hide toys, and ourselves. It was a sad day when the grass disappeared.
My kids are now finding the same magic in our backyard. I stand in the grass now and it comes to my waist, but my children lose themselves in it.
I could watch them for hours, and the smile would never leave my face. Sigh…I love summertime…


Adventures in Home-making

Yesterday morning I dug my cell phone out of my purse, where it had been buried for the entire weekend. I decided that calling back the 6 people that had tried to contact me would be a good way to avoid the 20 piles of clothes in my laundry room.

I keep forgeting how ambitious my friend Jen is. She’s always up to something. When I had called, I caught her in the midst of this little game she was playing. Let me preface with the fact that she has four children, spanning the ages of 5 through 12. They’re gone during the day, and she can’t sit still. (Hmmm, sounds like a personal problem.) So she has time to invent games like the one she had busied herself with that day.

She had found herself with much laundry to do, and it was a Monday so the house had it’s usual Weekend clutter collection. To take care of them both in a timely manner here were the rules to her game…

  • start a load and set the timer for 30 minutes. That way you make sure you are rotating your laundry in a timely fashion.

Umm, can I make it an hour? My washer fills up SO slowly because we’re on well water, and my dryer takes at least 70 minutes.

  • Yes you can make it 60 minutes, what ever works for you, just so that it’s consistant.
  • during this 30(or 60) minutes you must plan ahead what you are going to be doing in each alotted time slot
  • for 30 (or 60)minutes she was going to speed clean, that consisted of picking up anything that was out of place and throwing it in it’s correct room.

Jen, wait! I have a question! Do you put the childrens stuff away?

  • “NO! Absolutely not, this is a speed clean, don’t stop for anything, and the kids can put their stuff away at the end of the day, it’s their responsibility.”
  • one of her time slots might be for gardening
  • one for the kitchen
  • and so on…

Jen! Wait, what about lunch?

  • yes, you can break for lunch.

And when do you fold your laundry?

  • at the end of the day you fold all the laundry that you’ve thrown on your bed (for wrinkle prevention) and that’s when you can talk on the phone or watch T.V. but it’s nice to get it all folded at once.
  • But don’t do more than 5 loads in one day, because 5 is PLENTY!

The key thing to remember is to keep rotating the laundry, and speed clean, don’t concentrate on details…(at this moment in the conversation Jen screamed that she only had 2 minutes left and she had to run, but she was “kind of having fun with it.”)

This sounded like something I could possibly, maybe handle? At this point in my homemaking career I am really ready to try anything new.

So here’s how this game worked with Eve as a player…

10:30~Hang up with Jen, pumped. Set timer…began putting dishes away. (I think I’m  already  breaking the rules.) 

10:40~daughter hungry because she refused to eat breakfast. What does that girl have against cold cereal? I ponder. And then I make her a sandwich.

10:50~check the rest of my phone messages. My dad had come for a visit on Sunday but we weren’t home! This begs for an IMMEDIATE return call! Dad was sweet about it.

11:01~ I find a glitch in the system. No matter where I go I have this little shadow, my Bubba, and he wants whatever I have in my hand!

11:10 succumb to temptation and put the children in front of electric babysitter. ALARM GOES OFF! Aaaah! Did I only set in for 30 minutes? No way my clothes are dry!. Check the clothes, they aren’t. Restart timer for 30 minutes more. Decide I’m going to just take a “peek” at my e-mail. I’m waiting for a possible babysitter and it’s of the UTMOST importance.

11:35~ get up from e-mail. Kids of course want a computer game because I’m using it. Take some time to get them started on some “educational entertainment.” 

12:09~ check laundry-1 load down, 4 to go.

12:20~ pick up kindergartener from bus stop. Decide to walk to the park for lunch! SHE SAID I COULD BREAK FOR LUNCH PEOPLE!

2:21~ Back from a lovely day at the park, it was refreshing and I feel ready to face 4 more loads and the speed cleaning.

2:49~ finished rotating 2nd load. If I’m supposed to rotate 5 loads in 5 hours I have exactly 40 minutes left! Hmmm…not doing so well…

4:40 Start dinner. I have thus far accomplish folding 1/2 a load (of towels) AND putting it away. (which is totally against the rules but there was something good on pay per view.) 

4:45~Rotated 3rd load, put in 4th.  I’m optimistic I will finish 5 by the end of the day. 

End of the day summary…so the game didn’t quite work out perfectly but it was a means to get me jumped started. I did get my downstairs picked up and company appropriate. I did get the laundry organized. The clothes are still in my room, and SURPRISE! Not folded yet, but tomorrow is another day right?  I did do yard work with my family (which was a lot of fun) and I cleaned up the dinner dishes, which is not a normal habit of mine. I think that this game was in the very least a good influence on me. The reason I liked this game was it did get me jump starting and in a cleaning mode…which is VERY HARD to kick start sometimes. I sometimes have a hard time focusing on just one task which is why if I did this correctly, it would help that problem.

So try it yourself…see if it works for you and if you like working against a clock. For those of us who are procrastinators and love to work under the gun this may be the perfect thing.

Maybe next time I’ll do even better because I’ll be mentally prepared, and have a clear picture in my mind of what I want to accomplish.

Cheers Jen! My family thanks you.


More to brag about…

That's My Boy

I’m a blubbering idiot.

When am I going to be able to handle my children’s rights and passages in life with some grace?

I held in the tears as best I could. But I could NOT wipe the HUGE grin off my face as I watched my first born hoola- hoop for his P.E. assembly last week.

He gets it from his momma! I was Good Enough family reunion hula- hoop champion when I was, like…9?  

It couldn’t have been easy for him, a 6 year old, with his daddy’s physical disposition towards…well…girth. And he was one of two asked to participate out of his class. It was very exciting. To make it into the performance he had to hoola-hoop for over a minute straight!

I was so thrilled.

But honestly, I would like to stop shedding tears over matters such as these and just have a pleasant, un-embarrassing afternoon! So help me!

There are people who know and love me despite of myself. This isn’t Monday but I’ll be honest anyway…

I don’t shower that often. Da da dun…

When I was young I hated to bathe and it is still an issue. There are many reasons of which I hesitate to shower, of which I will name a few…

  • why shower on “me” time? I would much rather read or sleep or catch up on some blogs, phone calls to friends. Just about anything. Showering is a MUST DO and those types of things are never on “me” time.
  • once I’m in the shower, I find it really hard to get out. It becomes my own little world, I can hear no sounds but rushing water. I do some good thinking in there. It is dangerous, because let’s face it, I can’t stay in the shower and escape my messy house or naughty children forever.
  • when I’m out of the shower there is a whole list of chores I must to do myself. Those chores are daunting…drying myself off, getting dressed, I have a MESS of hair, it is very thick and sometimes very long. I dread blow drying and even just combing it out.
  • if I don’t blow dry my hair, I get these wet circles right about bosom level, where my hair hits. Then I look like my milk leaked out. Pesky.
  •  And let’s not forget that weird dryish feeling my skin takes on once I get out and am dry. It’s not comfortable. And then I have to apply lotion which is another chore.

In my perfect world I could shower when the timing felt right, not when I could scratch a few moments alone. After my shower I would don a terry cloth robe and lounge on my bed reading a good book, until my skin and hair had dripped dry. Then when I was GOOD and READY I would commence clothing myself.

Now that I think about it, I still wouldn’t bathe very often in that perfect world.   

So for to those that know and love me despite of myself, if I ever OFFEND thee I’m sorry. 

He came up to her, holding his boot in front of her face.

“Mom, there’s feathers and all kinds of stuff  in my boot.”

She grabbed the boot and looked closely, a little too  closely. She knew that smell, the smell of rotting bird flesh.

Without hesistation she flung the boot and it’s contents onto the lawn. The feathery clump of dead bird fell out.

She heard a peircing scream puncuate the air and realized it was coming from her own mouth.

This scared the babies more than the fallen crow. Her youngest threw his arms around her neck and kissed her. “Mama, mama?” He asked. Wanting to know she hadn’t truly lost it.

How did that bird meet it’s demise? And why was it in her eldest son’s boot?

Two theories, feel free to provide your own: a passing cat dropped it’s prize in a convenient hiding place?

Or did the sad little creature fly at top speeds into the window, and upon impact drop into the child’s boot?


You tell me.